Looking froward to those that have experience with communication issues.
Cheers,
Mike and Ashley Read
NS 26C #120 Nauti Girl
Bath, Ont.
I think you mean those “headsets” one can wear that’ll allow you to talk to each other over the noise of the engine.
Did look at ones from a motorcycle store, but realized that the problem was with me!
What I was doing (and, still do when I don’t focus) is to assume that my crew is still an absolute novice. On being around a dock, tying up or leaving, Deb, the “crew”, knows what she’s doing now. She keeps telling me “John - focus on what you have to do, and let me do my stuff!”
And, she’s right.
We also have our dog with us, that is great at gauging our (read: my) stress level, and the more stress, the more barking. The best (quietest) dockings happen when the dog (YoYo) is sitting beside me, watching what’s going on, and smooth dockings are q-u-i-e-t.
A great indicator.
Now, on the penultimate docking this season, strong wind over the quarter blowing us on to the dock, I had things almost lined up perfectly… miss the shallow parts; a boat length then make that turn, and I’ll get nicely blown onto the dock like a pro - when someone backed out without looking for traffic literally a half boat length in front, which caused a quick turn, an up-wind messy docking, and a couple of people coming to help, and YoYo picked up on the stress, and was barking like mad, and… and… Sigh!
JohnS NS26C 046
Reflecting on fun on the boat now on the hard in Bath ON
Thanks John,
Yes, I referring to duplex headsets for docking and anchoring purposes…ship to shore too.(dinghy)
…Not sure they make them in YoYo’s size though…
Cheers,
Mike and Ashley Read
NS 26C #120 Nauti Girl
Bath, Ont.
Headsets are neither PITAs or godsends, IMHO. Nor are they marriage savers. Transmitting and receiving sounds is not the same as actually communicating.
I remember reading an article by a woman sailor in a boating magazine some years back about anchoring with her husband over the years. They coordinated under the plan that the person at the bow guides with hand signals while the person at the helm follows their instructions. For years, he’d been at the bow until his back gave out and they had to swap roles. She was very frustrated to discover that no matter how broadly she made her hand signals, he couldn’t seem to follow them. She said their post mortem discussion went something like this:
Her: Couldn’t you see my signals?
Him: Sure I could.
Her: What was the problem then? Didn’t we agree that the one at the helm would follow the signals at the bow?
Him: Well, yes, dear. But that was when I was at the bow.
The title of the article was something along the lines of “Why Women Don’t Like to Go Sailing.”
Moral of my story being that I agree with John – everyone being clear on tasks/responsibilities and treating each other right is much better towards being a marriage saver than amplified voice transmission.
Easier said than done, though. I have an ex–wife who I used to scare the hell out of me for her safety because she kept grabbing dock lines near the cleats while I was using the engines to bring a 42-foot boat into position on the dock. I wanted her to keep her hands clear so I could maneuver without worrying that what I was doing was going to crush a finger. Conversely, she saw me as yelling at her when she was trying to be helpful. Why not adjust the lines by hand? Why do you think you have to do everything?
Never had the successful conversation to straighten it out.
There was also the time I was heading full speed toward a buoy. She was at the bow, too frightened to say anything, pointing to the buoy assuming that I would look where she was pointing and see it. I obediently steered where she pointed. That did not go well.
Again, if team members don’t know how to communicate, the communication aid doesn’t matter.
That said, being able to hear each other may not be sufficient, but it certainly can help. Hand signals work, too, but only you don’t need your hands for other things and the other doesn’t need their eyes for other things.
– Bob
Me Gusta
Nonsuch 26U #233
We use a slightly different approach that does not use much in the way of signals from the bow as the main method.
We generally motor around and pick out a spot. Once we agree we then identify 2 land marks to line us up. On off to port or starboard and one ahead of the bow.
We then circle about for the final approach . The person at the bow uses simple hand signals to indicate when to stop and when to reverse. The helm has the fwd and lateral landmarks and does not really rely on the bow to get the boat to the spot.
Not a great deal of discussion and hand waving takes place, it there needs to be more discussion we would go around again as at slow speed the boat is not all that manoeuvrable. We need a second approach sometimes if there is wind or the anchorage is crowded.
Thor
Singlehanding can be a marriage saver as well.
I never have arguments with the crew and my wife enjoys her time at home.
A little time apart works wonders sometimes. 
Paul M
NS30U #211, Sandpiper
Cowichan Bay, B.C.
I notice the same effects when I single hand.
Ward Woodruff
N33 #8 Margery
Niantic Bay, CT
I agree with Paul M that solo sailing simplifies things and makes miscommunication issues nil. That said I don’t recommend devices like headsets for communication for couples on the boat. One of the joys of sailing for me is watching the show as some couples attempt to pick up a mooring or anchor with limited experience and/or miscommunications. The yelling and looks are priceless. It would be disappointing not to have that entertainment available as I relax in the cockpit with a beverage. 
Mike
BIANKA
1986 30U
Long Island
I agree with Ward, Paul and Mike. A bit of time apart is good, especially if one’s other half doesn’t feel like going for a sail. Headsets are not a marriage saver. I am an expert on marriage savers. Been there, done that, got the T-shirt, etc. And, like my friends here, I have to admit being entertained while (sneakily) observing couples as they dock their vessels in challenging conditions (or CHALLENGED couples docking their vessels in calm, perfect conditions). But, the fun stops when my vessel becomes threatened due to their issues. That is for another thread, though.
Headsets, you ask ?? As a former stage manager for 4+ decades, I wore the best (and the worst) headsets daily and nightly. I started with old Bell-Tel (pinch yer damn ear off) hardwired bakelight specials (powered by car batteries) and eventually graduated to Clearcom (today’s industry standard) wireless comm units. All of these units were duplex - you could talk and listen at the same time (provided you could HEAR, that is). At a given time, as we all worked our way into the world of dependable wireless units, we used Motorola walkie-talkies with an attached headset. Annoyingly, they are simplex machines - you press and hold and talk - you let go and listen. Fortunately, Telex, HME and Clearcom came along with good duplex units - hardwire at first. Eventually, they went wireless and saved our lives (and many, many shows). Our headsets were always single-ear muff so we could hear music or speech or whatever. We didn’t use David Clark or Bose headsets. They are fabulous but are best left for aviation.
Before I forget, when I say “headset”, I am actually referring to both the belt pack and the headset that are connected by one wire. We never used the 100 lb. all-in-one special that you see TV car race reporters using (poor guys - their physio bills must be up there).
The thing about a headset is that you use them because you can/must depend on them. They simply have to work. Like your cell phone or landline or satphone. You EXPECT them to work. Our pro headsets cost a fair buck. They are NOT noise cancelling (as that feature tends to clip the first word or two). I fully understand why aviation and military headsets are noise cancelling but this feature doesn’t work in live performance.
So, take a pro headset and use it inside a building and, generally, it lasts a long time. Take it outside and the weather/climate plays havoc with it (along with stray RF signals, etc.). Your headset that costs 2K falls apart, sometimes quickly. Take the same headset out on the water and use it on your boat … well, if it doesn’t fall in the water, it still won’t last long. And that is what happens with a headset worth 2K. What, then, happens with a “recreational” quality unit, used out on the water ?? It becomes a headset that one cannot “depend” upon, really quickly. But, the really BIG issues with headsets are: when your head moves, they tend to fall off. ALWAYS. Unless your headset is manufactured by Vice-Grip. And/or there are thousands of seasoned stagehands and stage managers, floor managers, broadcasters, etc. that can enthrall their party guests with the hilarious stories of when something or someone snared the wire from the headset to the belt pack and one or the other or BOTH items crashed to the floor … and broke. Oh so funny in the middle of a complicated scene change. $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
If you absolutely MUST use some form of electronic comm device between you and your skipper or first mate, refer to that tasteful, informative and snazzy TV show called “Below Deck”. Unbeatable televison - so accurate. Anyway, they do what is done by all professional (I use that word carefully) seafarers - they use hand-held walkie-talkies. They clip on to your belt or waistband. These units are WAY cheaper and more dependable than any “economical” headset-type unit and you can crank the volume up full blast. If they fall in the drink (and, boy, they will), just buy new ones. If you absolutely must …
Personally, on my 22-footer (that I solo sail 95% of the time), I can just whisper to the person with the bow line. On something bigger, I’d speak louder or shout (in a non-aggressive way) or, seriously, use hand signals.
That’s my 2 cents+.
Ernie A. in Toronto (dreaming of sailing while it is cold and grey outside … boo hoo)
Well thank you,
The contingent of solo sailors and those who haven’t used them have certainly represented a field of view that we weren’t expecting. All valid advice.
We were hoping to hear from someone who has actually used them…hope springs eternal…
Thanks as always. the opinions of the group reflect many years of experience.
Re Below Deck: Yes, clearly the best yacht trash tv out there, and highly recommended to get you through the period when you boat’s on the hard. (not for those easily offended, but mandatory for those that have thick skins and a sense of humour). ESP Below Deck Sailing Yacht (BDSY).
Back on topic: There’s probably not an episode that goes by that does not feature a “docking disaster”. The scenario is always the same. Deck crew not able to communicate clearly with the captain due to distance, poor hand signals and walkie talkies unusable while hands are full…etc.
…although, as some have pointed out here, where would the drama be if it wasn’t for the public yelling over an engine while your boat loses gel-coat to the dock?
…and we’d miss out on Gary and Daisy’s banter.
Cheers,
Mike and Ashley Read
NS 26C #120 Nauti Girl
Bath, Ont.
Based on the advice I received from my brother (a very smart man) I bought a set of “Marriage Savers”. They we about $60 Canadian at the time. We have had them for about 15 years. They were budget items and built to the low cost. One quit working about 4 years ago but my bother knows a fellow who fixed it for us.
I don’t know why but for some reason the First Sea Lord actually likes to come sailing with me.
Prior to owning the Marriage Savers we tried hand signals. That did not work. Apparently my arms are short and the FSL could not see my signals around the mast. We tried shouting but that was no more successful. We then bought a decent set of walkie-talkies. WE set them up for voice activation. I would grunt as I hoisted the anchor. That would trigger the voice activation and the FSL would ask “What did you say?” I would respond I didn’t say anything. The engine would then trigger the FSL’s mike and I would ask “What did you say?” She wold then respond “I did not say anything”. The process went down hill from there.
We bought the Marriage Savers. Going on to and coming off the anchor have been much less dramatic/traumatic. We really missed them when we had them out for repair.
Range is about 200’. I know that because my brother and I have used them to communicate when the our boats are anchored close together. There is some static at times especially if one one headset is turned on. If only one is turned on the head set will often pick up a local radio station. We do a headset check each tie we go to use them and I try to be careful to make sure they are turn off when we put them back into the bag after use. I carry spare batteries for the times I don’t turn them off. We also have retaining straps on them so they don’t fall into the water.
I don’t know if they save marriages but I can tell you the number of floggings order by the FSL have dropped dramatically since we have started using the Marriage Savers.
Marriage Savers - don’t leave the dock without them.
Unfortunately, the low cost “Marriage Savers” are no longer available. Better quality ones are around but of course they cost more. We liked the MS because they were fully self contained.
Mark Powers
What’s wrong with hand signals? ..as long as more than one finger is used? In the before (covid) times we chartered with friends. The self-apponted bow person would point the boot hook at the buoy and keep it pointing so I could see that we were approaching. As it dropped in angle I slowed down. By the time the hook pointed straight down we were stopped and the line picked up. There were other signs such arm out pointing sideways (duh) and circle in the air to say “all clear” or “line secured”. It worked well.
Once moored, we would judge the mooring olympics. That is when we watched, for example, a boat approach the mooring buoy downwind at speed and the wife hooks the mooring line and runs the full length of the boat and finally lets go of the boat hook - picture of that boat if requested. We rated it a 2, generous because he managed to get the hook back on subsequent attempts. The really cringy ones (more than once) when someone jumps in to grab the mooring line while the engine is running, one even swam between the catamaran’s hulls (amas). There were many 8 to 10, it is the lower numbers that are memorable.
Alan & Tracy, “Corvus” NS30C, BPYC Toronto
Under ideal conditions and with seasoned crew hand signals have stood the test of time quite well. However, we don’t always operate in such an ideal scenario so I recommend “marriage savers” wholeheartedly.
I’ve used the “marriage savers” for years with great satisfaction even when operating without a spouse in the loop. I see no need to reiterate the aid they provide while anchoring but there are other times when they are quite useful. Specifically, such devices are a great benefit when maneuvering in shallow waters at night or in foggy conditions or seeking a slip at a new marina when the helmsman monitoring the chart plotter listens for confirmations and directions from watchful crew at the bow. Under such conditions most comms can be relayed without a stressful tone and with little need to repeat in frustration.Never heard a complaint about using them.
Ed Strazzini
PELICAN, N33#36
Deltaville, VA
As luck would have it, Santa was kind enough to provide us with the aforementioned kit this morning. It/they proved useful within 1 hr while installing a new light fixture.
We’ve all been there. One of you at the circuit breaker and one at the fixture, yelling, “is the light off yet?”, as you work your way through the number of mislabelled breakers.
'Comms were smooth, no yelling, and tempers did not flare.
I’m now realizing these are for more than docking/anchoring, but galley/drink orders and who knows what else.
Cheers,
Mike and Ashley Read
NS 26C #120 Nauti Girl
Bath, Ont.
We have a pair and will never be without them. The communication is always just light and calm no matter what we are doing. Any time, prior to having them, that a voice had to be raised to be heard increased the level of stress for both of us. Now we communicate as if we are cosied up below decks having a wonderful conversation.
Scott, I can’t believe that you were ever stressed nor that Anita ever raised her voice.
Mark Powers
Can someone the make and models they are using. These can get very pricey.
Thanks
Peter Farley
Knot in a Hurry U30
Keyport NJ
Peter: These are FRS 2 way radios and can be had at the local Walmart or electronic store for $25.00. However, they are not “hands free” but will clip on a belt.
Joe
EARTEC UL2S UltraLITE Full Duplex Wireless Headset Communication for 2 Users - 2 Single Ear Headsets
Check AMZ for pricing.
Cheers,
Mike and Ashley Read
NS 26C #120 Nauti Girl
Bath, Ont.
OK - I’ll cave. A pair of these guys costs $249.00 USD (down from $349.00) from Eartec in the USA and they appear to look good and just may actually stay on your head. They are on sale due to an overstock. I’d contact EARTEC in the USA and have them shipped to wherever. Amazon in Canada wants $740.00 CAD. THAT is somewhat more than TWICE the price of $249.00 USD.
NEVER buy a thing from Amazon unless you really research the alternatives. Jeff Bezos became Jeff Bezos thanks to consumers paying WAY too much for Amazon convenience.
The bigger the boat, the more of a need for headsets (I suppose … )
Ernie A. in Toronto